weeks. days. hours. minutes.

There a lot of things happening of late. Exciting things. Springtime is upon us and it's awesome! I just want to post one of my favourite videos of all time - boyzone and mr. bean. Now for those of you who don't know, Boyzone are an Irish boyband and were a quite a big deal back in the mid-late 90s esp in Asia and Europe. And their lead singer Ronan Keating, is a great lad (he even wrote a book called Life is a Rollercoaster which was sweet). He's had a decent solo career since then. I actually met him in person on my 17th birthday at Jerudong Park (which was a FREE disney world...only in Brunei, really, there was no better place to grow up).

One month from now, I'll be back in brunei after almost 3 years. I'm excited. But I have to really face through the hurdles of this term.

One year ago, I was really excited and pumped about everything but especially about going to Calgary. It really was a summer to remember. Now, lots of other folks are heading out as well. It's nice. This song, 'Picture of You' reminds me of Calgary because when I first headed out there, I was thinking about how it was never going to be anything like Montreal. Well, it wasn't. But it was still sublime on so many levels. I had a picture of you in my mind...I never knew I could be so wrong...here's to my mates from Calgary (who make up the majority of my blog readers anyway lol).

the science of knowing and the art of living

The title is taken from a chapter of the book 'Can Man live without God?' by Ravi Zacharias.
Reading it has been really edifying to my faith which has been transistory of late. I highly recommed it. I had the privelege of hearing him speak when he came to UW 2 years ago. In many ways, our lives parallel - we were born in the same hospital; the Madras General, India.

I want to quote some things that are poignant and moving to me:

"Who am I?...Am I only what I know of myself?
restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage.
Struggling for breath as though hands
were compressing my throat,
yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds,
thirsting for words of kindness, for neighbourliness,
trembling with anger at despotisms and petty humiliation,
tossing in expectation of great events,
powerlessly trembling for friends at a great distance,
weary and empty at praying at thinking, at making,
faint and ready to say farewell to it all?
Who am I? This or the other?
Am I one person today and tomorrow another?
Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,
and before myself a contemptibly woebegone weakling?
Or is something in me still like a beaten army,
fleeing in disorder from the victory already achieved?" - Dietrich Bohoeffer

This next passage captures in a few words what many have tried to elaborate incessantly on:

"The whole conviction of my life now rests upon the belief that the sense of loneliness, far from being a rare and curious phenomenon peculiar to myself and a few other solitary people, is the central and inevitable fact of human existence. All this hideous doubt, despair and dark confusion of the soul, a lonely person must know, for he is united to no image save that which he creates for himself. He is bolstered by no other knowledge save that which he can gather with the vision of his own eyes and brain. He is sustained and cheered and aided by no party. He is given comfort by no creed. He has no faith in him except his own and often that faith leaves him shaken and filled with impotence. Then it seems to him that his life has come to nothing. That he is ruined, lost and broken past redemption and that morning...that bright and shining morning with its promise of new beginnings will NEVER come upon the earth again as it did once." - Thomas Wolfe.


There it is. My sentiments exactly. I'll keep searching.

just another day

Boundless has always been a great resource for me since way back in 2001. Recently, there was an article called 'Ordinary People' which has rocked my boat. It talks a lot about the ubiquitous-ness of blogs and other personalised chat groups (facebook and youtube included) but it seems paradoxical as we have always guarded our rights to personal privacy, yet unashamedly flaunt all for the world (supposedly) to see. Why do I write this blog? I don't think more than 10 people read it, and there is no earth shattering stuff or even calibre-laden writing. Maybe I want to be a 'micro-celebrity' too? The point that "the less gifted among us are willing to fart ourselves into the spotlight" (Lakshmi Chaudhry) is jarring. Sometimes its true - all of this can be so ordinary? Who really cares anyway? I will quote more of it:

"While the narcissism Chaudhry mentions no doubt plays a part, there's a desperate quality to much of what's posted that can't only be explained by the belief that you are incredibly fascinating. Few of the revelations involve scientific breakthroughs, blazing insights or joining Al Qaeda — much of the stuff being revealed is quotidian to the point of banality. Who hasn't been through a break-up or even experienced painful personal loss?

This recitation of the stuff of everyday life is a tacit admission that the revealers, on some level, know that, as Tyler Durden would no doubt tell them, they're not "beautiful and unique snowflakes." They know that they're, in fact, fairly ordinary and they can only meet their "need to feel significant and admired and, above all, to be seen" through the quantity and explicitness of their revelations, not their quality. Ironically, in a world where many of your peers are doing the same, this self-revelation makes them seem more ordinary, not less.

This begs an obvious question: What's wrong with being ordinary? A lot, if you live in a culture like ours that has turned "ordinary" into an epithet, a synonym for "mediocre." Then, the fear of being (or appearing) "ordinary" exceeds the fear of possible humiliation or any other repercussions of inappropriate disclosure."

My friend steve once said "blogging? yea, it helps to soothe the loneliness". hmmm. What's really going on in our existence? (see next blog)

stem cells and Jesus

I don't think I can gush enough about how proud I am of the CBC as a Public news service (tho it really lags behind the BBC for International coverage) and how it has evolved and is competent.

One of my favourite shows there is, is the Hour by Georgie. It is just a show that is simply groundbreaking in terms of its approach. I don't think anyone in the world right now can do it quite like Georgie.

I don't know how many people are talking about the Lost Tomb of Jesus, if you haven't it's about some ossuaries found in Jerusalem, it's a family tomb and it apparently Jesus and yea.."his family" with Mary Magdalene and their child. Ok...of all the controversies from 2000 years, this sounds really like 'wat? are you kidding me?' It can't be that simple. I don't know the facts, haven't read the book or seen the movie, so I don't know what to say. But this I know - there has never been quite a figure like Jesus...really. You can see the interview with Simcha Jacobivici here.

Recently, Franklin, son of Billy Graham was also on the show. Throughout the whole interview, he simply kept in line with who Jesus is and what the gospel is about. I think George was very fair as well. I like this man Franklin. He has this quiet confidence that I always wish I had constantly but have to pretned I do most of the time. Maybe someday, I'll actually know who I am and believe something with some conviction too. You can see the interview here.

I know that a lot of people know Justin Trudeau as the son of former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau and who delivered the now famous eulogy at his fathers funeral in 2000. I had the chance to see him speak this past week. I remember feeling really excited - I think there is this feeling that I want to belong to a place and then be a leader and couse change not only to that place but everything around it. Justin is a very charismatic and charming speaker and really cares about his country, the environment and appeals to the idealist in me. But in my mind, although he will make an excellent politician (he was also a teacher in BC, a profession my mom adores) I don't think he has what it takes to be a leader. One - he is not ruthless enough to make tough decisions. Former Sugeon General Everett Koop mentioned that during the abortion debate in the US, Christians would only see 100% right and 100% wrong...and thus miss out on making a compromise which would benefit it all. This attitude of all or nothing does not work in the real world especially with government decisions. His answers to some questions sounded very cliche and flimsy, as if he was not knowledgable enough. He is a young man, and he is growing. If he ever becomes Prime Minister, he needs to have a lot of concrete practicality under his belt. (his wife Gregoire is pretty hot tho...lol)

Got educated about the Air India tragedy from 1985. To think that it is still unsolved and that 331 people died. CBC archives has a good section on it. Have also been fascinated by Sikh history...there are close to 300,000 Punjabis in Canada, second only to Britain (that's like almost all of brunei tabawet!) 150,000 in BC alone. The whole Golden Temple bombing 1984, Indira Gandhi, the ensuing Sikh violence...although I am a quarter Rajasthani (a state right next to Punjab) I am a world away in terms of identity. I want to know more. Why is there so much strife?

Finally, there has been a lot of talk about stem cell research and how Christians are against it and how it is anti science etc. But there is an very humble and excellent article from Christianity today - I will quote it, but the full version is here.

"Leon Kass, a member and former chair of the President's Council on Bioethics and professor at the University of Chicago, argues that "victory over mortality is the unstated but implicit goal of modern medical science." He writes, "In parallel with medical progress, a new moral sensibility has developed that serves precisely medicine's crusade against mortality: Anything is permitted if it saves life, cures disease, prevents death."

Kass is not alone. Sherwin Nuland, a surgeon and author of How We Die, peppers his book with warnings of the hubris of scientists. "The fantasy of controlling nature lies at the very basis of modern science. … The ultimate aim of the scientist is not only knowledge for the sake of knowledge, but knowledge with the aim of overcoming that in our environment which he views as hostile. None of the acts of nature (or Nature) is more hostile than death."

Nuland says medical science will never find the Fountain of Youth. "Every triumph over some major pathology, no matter how ringing the victory, is only a reprieve from the inevitable end."

Perhaps our culture clings so tenaciously to the hope of extended youthfulness and lasting life because we have shoved death from view. "All the things that once prepared us for death—regular experience with illness and death, public grief and mourning, a culture and philosophy of death, interaction with the elderly, as well as the visibility of our own aging—are virtually gone from our lives," writes Virginia Morris in Talking About Death. "Instead, we are tempted daily by that perfect apple, by promises of youth and immortality."

The apple that's currently tempting our society is the half-million frozen human embryos created in fertility clinics. Our culture so clings to life that it is prepared to legislate taking of life at its earliest stages in order to graft it on at the end...

When we show in our weekly life that we follow the Way that transcends death, the larger culture will begin to see that its obsession with youth is not a celebration of life, but a rejection of the inevitable. Science and medicine, for all the good gifts they provide, will never be sure paths to human happiness."

That article has impacted me a lot. I have a problem with withering away and dying. So yea...stem cell research...why are we so obsessed with being immortal? Chinue Achebe said it best with his book title...'Things Fall Apart'.

honey, I'm from UW, I love intercourse...uh, intellectual that is...

So I had an intersting day yesterday:

Had my Don interview for the next school year. It was a re-hiring process and I was bloody nervous. But I just prayed about it and had a good peace about it - there's wasn't too much I could control. Firstly, I don't think I'm a great Don. But I know I can be and I want to be. I've been blessed with an exceptional floor of really mature and independent freshmen. So i just did my thing...being genuine is all I know how to really be. My interviewers cried...i don't think that has happened to me before. I'm excited to come back if I do.

And we had a religious/spiritual discussion with some guys on my floor: Here is a portion of how it went...

Iain (atheist): "So you think that gay people go to hell?"
Sean (orthodox christian): "yep, its true, that's what the bible says"
Iain: "But what about animals?"
Sean: "yea, all animals go to heaven...it's true!"
Iain: "what about gay animals? Do they go to hell? about 30% of animals engage in homosexual behaviour"
*room erupts in laughter and I sit there shaking my head and smiling at the profoundity of it all (sarcastic)...I love my floor. I have the best job anyone who is a full-time student could possibly have.



Went to a Health Informatics Seminar - it's a field that I'm really interested in. The speaker was Dr. Patel from Columbia University, New York. She's brown and spent a lot of time in McGill (Montreal). I could relate. It was about how to utilize the increasing sophistication of technology and training medical practitioners to become better and less error prone. One her most fascinating points was that we don't do top-down or bottom-up processing but a lot of intermediate chunks which helps us evaluate things that much faster. So really it is the intermediate components, the link between the basic observation and end diagnosis that is vital and this is far more developed in experts (e.g. grandmaster chess players have better recognition of location stratagems than novices). I think this is important in how we make decisions daily and relate to people, God, relatioships and all that good stuff that is life. I hope to do more research into it someday.

Facebook groups...they are stupid, mostly anyway. Why would anyone want to join: 'Girls sh*t on your heart and forget to clean up after they leave' LOL. Who is making these groups? I could say more but really... nUFF SAID.

Melody Hui is a sassy girl.

This ad from hireimmigrants.ca



Bad quality but its all I could find...By 2011, 100% of Canada's net labour market growth will depend on immigration. It's about high time that we started doing something to help assimilate skilled immigrants...funny...i said we...I'm still a temporary resident, not even an immigrant yet...but I feel very Canadian in a lot of ways. I rather be nowhere else in the world.